About 2 weeks ago I received some quite difficult news regarding my mums health. This year has really had its difficult times, but I think this was the hardest thing to hear about because it made me feel so far away. But oh my goodness, how God held me close. The weekend after we left we were able to visit a beautiful part of the south of Chile called Pucon. It was kind of our holiday seeing as we were not able to do what we had really planned due to the earthquake. The timing was perfect. It was the most beautiful place I have ever seen and I couldnt help and stop and look at the big mountains, the volcano, the still lakes and see how God is so so so loving, and he is so in control of it all. One particular day we went to a lake, and had an hour or so by ourselves to spend time with God. I was just wondering around listening to some worship music and climbing over some rocks, and asking God questions about what was happening, and how I could deal with this thing that seemed so huge. One song really stuck out to me the lyrics go like this
Its the sweetest thing, to trust you, just to know youve got everything under control
you are making me a mountain, making me a mountain that cannot be shaken.
high up on a rock looking out at the horizon,
watching a storm roll in wondering if my heart will survive it
and as the waves crash all around me
and i cant remember what it feels like to be free
i know youre making me a mountain
making me a mountain, that cannot be moved
you say, i've got you my baby, oh i've got you
its quite the mess you're in but it's nothing love can't fix
so sit here, upon my shoulders
and watch as it all unwinds
When I was singing to God next to this lake, I just knew that he had taken the worry from me. There is no good in worrying, I asked God to be in control of the situation, and I trust that he is. I trust that there is nothing that will happen that he does not permit. God is so so loving, and I know that whatever happens it will be out of an incredible love for us, and for my beautiful mum. I learnt many things through the time of the earthquake, which now are all just ringing true in this time. I learnt how God is firm, God is dependable, and yeah in this time God has completly been my rock. When I felt scared, he strengthened me, when I felt lonely, he sent the right people, when I felt angry, he was there to hear my thoughts. He is there. He is so here. I have no idea how people find the strength to go through these things without the hope that I have found.
So yeah, due to finding out this information, it also had a knock on effect. I will not be going to Ecuador as I was planning to do. I will be coming to work for OM in Birmingham, so that I may be closer to my mum. But it works well as a comprimise because I didn't want to be so far away from my family in this time, but also i didn't want to just finish my programme so early. I really felt there was more for me to do. So this opportunity in Birmingham is just perfect. Its just kind of a bit weird for it all to change so suddenly, and with only 4 weeks left here in Chile! I will have to deal with things 3 months earlier than I was expecting to. but I am excited non the less, so so excited. It is a shame not to see the beautiful country of Ecuador, but I will have pleanty of time to see beautiful things, my family is a lot more important to me than ticking off another country on my list!
But yeah with all these things going on, time is just slipping away you know! I am staying with a friend from tonight to Monday afternoon as part of our cultural experience thing, and then next Tuesday we are going away as the whole of OM Chile for a retreat where we will receive training about how to help people in times of crisis. Specificaly the earthquake, we will also get debreifing about all that and receive some counselling ourselves for those who still feel effected by all that happened. Which is very good of OM to do that. But yeah... then after that week we have about 1 more normal week, and then for the last couple of weeks it is all saying goodbye, doing special things with our minstries and wrapping things up! I am so glad that I have been here in Chile, God has taught me so much more than I could ever have imagined. He has been faithful and taking me through experiences that bring me closer to him. He has given me dreams for the future, and a new excitement for my life. It will be sad to leave, but I also feel it is the time, I feel God has many more things planned for me, and I am excited to put the things I have learnt into practice.
God has just taught me again and again this year, how he is God, and how I am not. How I will be so much stronger if I place all I have in his hands. He takes good care of it. I can trust him.
How this means me knows me, I do not have to pretend to be something else to get his attention, or his approval.
"Praise the LORD oh my soul, and let all that's within me praise his name. For I will not die I will live, and I will tell of the works of the LORD, I will sing of his wonders. I will not die I will live, for he's a great God. I get to love you through whatever comes, what a privilidge it is. Oh how sweet it is, that I get to love you through whatever comes. Nothing is going to take your praise out my mouth, as long as I shall live. Nothings going to take your praise out of my mouth as long as I shall live."
- Kristene Mueller, Praise the LORD
Please pray for the last few weeks left here in Chile, that the whole team will be able to finish well, and that we will say goodbye properly, which will be difficult especially with the Hogar. Pray that in the next steps God will continue to guide me, and will prepare me for Birmingham
Have an amazing few weeks.
Sending loads of hugs from Chile, Emma xx
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